1 Year Down, Forever to Go

Happy anniversary to me! Actually, our anniversary was yesterday, but I've decided I'm just going to use the month of June to celebrate. Because I can.

It's been a year full of ups and down. Sadly, a lot of downs. But we made it through. We persevered and actually had a wonderful anniversary celebration. Because I was unable to get the weekend of our anniversary off, we officially celebrated the first weekend in June. I asked for the entire weekend off of work (which never happens) and waited patiently for Matt to make plans like he swore to me he would. Fast forward to the Wednesday before we're supposed to leave and.... nothing. In all honesty, this didn't surprise me. The man hasn't booked a trip the entire 4 years we've been together. I've planned every single trip we've gone on, including the ones for my birthday. So when people asked what we were doing this weekend, I responded with "Nothing. Probably just hanging around the house, maybe rent a few movies" because that's what I anticipated doing. I wasn't really upset because it was something that I anticipated. He tends to forget about things like that and not make them a priority. I pretty much talking myself into believing that I would be okay with a lazy weekend around the house. With our roommate around. And all of Matt's friends. And the animals.

Well, surprise surprise! The Thursday before we were supposed to leave he comes into the house after work and states simply that we were going to the bay for the weekend. After a few questions I determine that he had booked a hotel in the Santa Cruz area for Saturday night and wanted to take me to the boardwalk. I haven't been in almost 10 years so I was thrilled! A day at the beach, with rides and terrible food. I couldn't ask for more. Especially since I hadn't seen the ocean in nearly a year!

And it was awesome. We left late-morning on Saturday and headed down to our hotel. The ride was traffic packed so we ended up arriving a bit later than we anticipated, so rather than spend a watered down day at the boardwalk we spent Saturday shopping, having an awesome dinner and... bonding at the hotel. If you haven't been to Gilroy, CA I highly recommend it. The entire town smells like garlic. It's pretty much heaven. They also have a fantastic outlet mall. Tons of shops! After a bit of shopping we went stopped at a random BBQ place for dinner called Famous Dave's. It was A-M-A-Z-I-N-G. I've never had so much food in my entire life. We ordered the platter for 2 and it was enough food to feed both of us for at least 2 days. Ribs, BBQ chicken, pulled pork, corn on the cob, corn bread muffins, baked beans and coleslaw. Surprisingly, we made a HUGE dent in the plate. Then we had to go pass out at the hotel and watch terrible HBO movies because we were stuffed!

This is what Matt does while we're having a wonderful conversation over breakfast.

We slept in a bit the next day and then headed to the boardwalk. We got an awesome deal from Costco where for $55 we got entrance to the boardwalk, 2 unlimited ride wristbands and 5 tickets to either get arcade coupons or to have an "experience" (mini golf, laser tag, haunted house, etc). We spent the first part of our day riding all of the rides. We got to check out a couple roller coasters (a wooden one that killed my neck), bumper cars, a terrible haunted house and, my favorite, the log ride. Even though I got kind of soaked. And I was wearing jeans.

One of my favorite photos of the day.  =)

We checked out a couple of the shops, then decided to do some mini golf. I haven't mini golfed in years so, obviously, I was terrible. It was a pretty great set up though. They had wheels at some of the holes that you spun to determine what your handicap would be that game. At one point Matt had to hit his first shot with the wrong end of the club, and then he got to stand in the middle of the green when I shot. Totally unfair. It was definitely a nice way to spice up the game. Also, half of the holes were glow in the dark, with black light. Kept things interesting!

On our way out we still had a couple tickets left so we found a couple of kids to give them to. They were pretty excited to get to play more video games. Glad we could help.  =)  We stopped for gas about a half hour North and decided to grab something to eat at this little Japanese restaurant. Yes, I got BBQ and Japanese food in matter of 24 hours. It was fantastic. We didn't get home until almost 11pm which was much later than we anticipated, but it was definitely worth it. It was the first weekend we've spent together since our honeymoon and it couldn't have been more needed!

To top it off, yesterday on our actual anniversary he came home with roses and a card. This is the 4th time in 4 years that he's given me flowers! He scored some major points the last couple weeks!

Now, I need to head off and check on my pot roast. And make some mashed potatoes of course. I will be back soon with, hopefully, a more productive entry! =)

Rainy Weather = Soup Weather!

Yesterday, it was raining. I HATE when it rains. Not only is it cold and windy outside, but I'm stuck in the house with 2 restless dogs desperate to go to the park. They just sit there and look at me all sad like. It's just pathetic. So, rather than sit there and stare down my dogs, I decided it was a good day for soup! I've had a massive craving for potato soup lately so I decided to cave and go for it. My initial inclination was to use my crock pot but because mine is ridiculously small, I had to upgrade and use my stock pot on the stove. Oh well, I can adapt!

Without further ado, I give you loaded baked potato soup. This is definitely tied for first place for my favorite soup of all time. It is SO filling and pretty much terrible for you, so be aware. lol

Ingredients:

• 7 or 8 medium sized potatoes, cubed in 1/2 pieces  (Ish.)
• 1 large onion, chopped
• 5 cups of chicken broth   (I prefer the unsalted kind.)
• 4 Tbs. minced garlic
• 1/4 cup unsalted butter 
• 2 tsp. salt   (Add more to taste at the end of cooking.)
• 3 tsp. pepper 
• 1 1/ 2 cups of half & half
• 1 cup shredded cheddar cheese
• 3 tablespoons chopped chives, or green onions if you're like me and every store you go to is out of chives   (REALLY!? I went to 3 stores!)
• 1 cup sour cream   (This is totally options, but totally recommended!)
• 8 slices cooked bacon, crumbled
• Cheese and bacon bits for a topping, if desired

How To: 

Mid-cooking.

In a large stock pot combine the potatoes, onion, garlic, butter, chicken broth, salt, and pepper. Bring the mixture to a boil then continue cooking on medium-low for 45 minutes to an hour, or until potatoes are soft. Stir in the cream, cheese, bacon, and chives. Simmer on low until the mixture is thickened. Serve topped with sour cream and (if you're terribly unhealthy like me) extra bacon bits, chives and cheese. Makes 12-15 cups.

And here's your end result!

 If you'd like to do this recipe in the crock pot you can follow the same instructions but, rather than a stock pot, you can slow cook everything on high for 4 hours or on low for 7 prior to adding the cream, bacon, cheese and chives. It's just as amazing, I'm just impatient!

Hope y'all enjoy!

Who loves picture frames? I love picture frames!

Hello there ladies! And gentlemen? I'm not sure guys would actually read my blog, so I will stick with ladies for now. Unless someone gets offended, then let me know and I'll change!

It's been a little bit since I've posted, mainly because I've been in the midst of projects and celebrating my 1 year anniversary with my husband. Yahoo, we actually made it a year! But, now that I'm back, I have several different things to share. Depending on how I'm feeling I may bust them all out today, or maybe I'll try to spread them out throughout the week. We shall find out!

First and foremost, about a week and a half ago set out to create a gallery wall. Actually, planning for this wall has been going on for months. This pretty much consisted of me collecting frames and other items to put on the wall, and finding the best places to get photos printed up. For frames, my top 3 recommendations are:

1. The Dollar Store - Really any dollar store but in particular I used the Dollar Tree. I was able to get 8"x10", 5"x7" and 4"x6" frames for (GASP!) a dollar each. Granted they are not the greatest quality in the world but they look decent once you put them on the wall. 
2. Wal-Mart - As much as my husband hates Wal-Mart I still find ways to make my way there and take advantage of some good deals. They have 8"x10", 5"x7" and 4"x6" frames for $2-3 a piece. There were several different designs and they were a lot better quality than the ones at the dollar store. One tip though, double check the back of the frame and make sure they have a wall hanger! I got several 5"x7" that I'm going to have to modify to hang!
3. Michael's - I love Michael's for so many reason, but their frames are definitely in my top 3. I got some amazing 12"x18" frames for $8 a piece. By the way 12"x18" is a very hard size to find affordable frames for!

As for getting the actually prints, there are always options like Walgreens and Costco and such, but I found the BEST deals were through a site called ArtsCow.com. When you sign up as a new member you get a huge amount of free prints; 4"x6" on up to 12"x18". All you have to do is pay for shipping. I got 63 prints for about $20, and they were amazing quality prints. I'm a bit of a picture quality snob and I was even impressed. By the way, if you need a stretched canvas print, they are awesome for those too.

This is what I had to work with, after all was said and done. Don't mind my pretty boy Morgan posing there in the background. He's so photogenic.  =)

My next challenge was choosing the location of my gallery wall. My initial thought was to put it down the back hallway in between our bedrooms because well, it's really empty there. But after some thought and input from friends and family I decided against it. Not only was the lighting terrible there, but people rarely venture down that hall and if I'm going to put that much work into something, people need to see it! So, I chose a wall in our family/game room. There are 2 large windows and a french door nearby which let in a ton of nature light, and it's in a really high traffic area. BINGO! Because the room has a vaulted ceiling I had to decide whether I wanted to go all the way up, or make the gallery even with the top of the doorway. I decided that being even with the doorway was a better bet because it would allow people to actually see the photos that were going to be displayed.

This is the wall I chose to use. The one between the doorway and the kitchen cabinets.

Now, there are a couple ways you can go about mapping out your wall and putting your photos up. You can randomly start hammering nails and hope that your gut instincts are right on, or you can use templates. I chose to begin with templates, mainly because my gut instincts generally are wrong. Like, really wrong. For the couple weeks prior to beginning my wall I started saving junk mail, flyers, magazine and advertisements. Luckily we tend to receive a ton in the mail so it didn't take me long to collect everything I needed. Just make sure to collect several different paper sizes depending on your frames. You can tape 2 pieces together if needed, but it's more of a pain. On each template I wrote what the object was, the size of the frame and whether the image was black & white or color. I also made sure to note whether it was a horizontal or vertical image which made things so much easier once I got to the mapping stage.

Here is an example of one of my templates. Pretty basic right?

Next, using a measuring tape and pencil I marked an "x" on the template to indicate where the nail was going to need to go. I measured across the template in several spots so that I was able to create a vertical line down the middle, and then I measured down the line to where my "x" needed to go. This seemed to be very effective seeing as how only 1 of my frames had to be adjusted after the fact.

Not the prettiest picture, but you get the idea!

Now comes the fun part, actually sticking everything to the wall! Using scotch tape or painter's tape (something that is easily removable) you can start mapping everything out without having to worry about making unnecessary holes in the wall. The best recommendations I can give you is to invest in a laser level. Oh man, BEST.INVENTION.EVER! Not the mention I found one on clearance at Lowe's for $4.99. Granted if you can't find one on clearance you can find decent Black & Decker ones for $15-20 and they work perfect for this purpose. I began my mapping by using my level to create a line parallel to the doorway of the room. From there, I just started putting pictures up. Mostly randomly, but I made sure to try and spread out black and white images and different sizes. The awesome thing about using the tape is that you can move the images around as much as you want and not have to worry about damaging anything. I must have pulled everything off of the wall a hundred times before I was satisfied with the final product.

Wall-O-Templates!

My second best recommendation is to not be in a hurry to start hammering. I had newspaper taped to my wall for DAYS prior to actually hanging my frames. I slept on it, looked it over several times, got the opinion of friends and family... the works. It was worth the wait to know that I was going to be happy with the final product. After some slight tweaking, I was ready to get down to the hard labor. Actually, it wasn't hard at all. After all the prep work is done, actually putting everything on the wall is pretty simple. For my 4"x6" and 5"x7" frames I used simple small picture nails whereas for the larger frames and heavier objects I used drywall screws. Using my heaviest piece I tested the strength of the drywall to determine whether or not to use anchors. If you don't know, anchors are plastic cone-shaped objects that are inserted into the drywall via a pre-drilled hole. They are designed to relieve some of the stress placed on the drywall and to keep the screw from becoming lose in the wall. Luckily, I didn't need these but I highly recommend double checking to be sure. It can save you a lot of grief in the future!

Using the "x's" that I drew, I started hammering/screwing in my hardware. After each nail/screw I temporarily hung the photo the make sure that it lined up with the template. It took maybe 10 minutes and I was ready to actually hang my photos. One-by-one I pulled the template off of the wall and hung up the corresponding photo; working from the top, down. Eventually I was left with this:

Don't mind the 3 pieces of newspaper still up. I'm working on figuring out a way to put up the frames I purchased that didn't have wall hangers. I've got to make a Home Depot run!

I'm very happy with the final product, and surprisingly so is my husband. I know he was weary about a wall of pictures at first but he's been complementing it since I finished. I'm still tweaking things here and there to make sure it's all level, but it's pretty much set. So there it is! If you have any questions, don't hesitate to ask. This project was actually a lot of fun. I highly recommend it, especially if you're photo obsessed like I am!

Peer pressure.

Lately I have been doing great pretty good with my healthy eating kick. I stopped buying junk food while out grocery shopping. Traded in Doritos for raw almonds and chocolate for grapes and apples. By not having this stuff in the house I have been forced into either eating healthy, or not eating at all (which we all know is impossible). What I didn't think of at the time was that, although I wasn't purchasing junk food, I still had everything I needed to make my own!

I don't think I've mentioned this yet, but I spend a lot of time chatting with a group of ladies that I met through TheKnot.com while planning my wedding. We were all June 2011 brides and formed pretty strong bonds during the process. Although many think we are nuts for keeping in touch like we do, Juneville (as we have dubbed it) has been a great support for me and full of inspiration! Hell, the girls on there probably know more about my life than most of my real life friends! Anywho, today our little township was full of junk food talk. What are your favorite junk foods? Who wants me to send them amazing cookies? Which is better, Pepsi or Coke? FYI: The answer is Pepsi. So, I caved into the peer pressure, dug through my over-packed baking cabinet and got out all my supplies. COOKIE TIME!

So, without further ado, I give you the recipe for (what I think) are some of the most amazing cookies ever made. Ever.

Double Chocolate, Double Peanut Butter Cookies

Ingredients:

• 2 sticks of unsalted butter: About 1 cup, a little colder than room temp works best.
• 1¼ cup sugar
• 2 large eggs
• ¼ cup peanut butter: I chose chunky because that's what I had plus, I like the added texture.
• ½ cup dark cocoa powder: I used Ghirardelli, unsweetened.
• 2¼ cups all-purpose flour
• ¼ tsp. salt
• 1 tsp. baking powder
• 6 ounces of peanut butter chips: I'm a snob and use the Reese's ones. About half a bag.
• 8 ounces semi-sweet chocolate chips: About ¾ of a bag.

How to:

First off, preheat your oven to 350 degrees and lightly grease your cookie sheet(s).  Begin by cubing your butter and mixing it with the sugar until fluffy-ish (about a minute or two). Then, one at a time, add your eggs and once they are well blended add in the peanut butter. At this point the mixture will be kind of runny. Next, slowly add in the cocoa powder, followed by the flour, salt and baking powder. Mix at a medium speed for roughly 3 minutes to ensure that all the lumps and such are polished out. Lastly, add your chocolate and peanut butter chips. I definitely recommend mixing these in by hand because, while your mixer will do it, it also kind of destroys the chips as they are smashed up against the side of the bowl.

After you are all blended up, drop the batter by "heaping teaspoons" onto the cookie sheet. Generally my heaping teaspoon was a ½ inch-ish ball. Bake at 350 degrees for about 12 minutes. When you remove the sheet from the oven, let it sit and cool for 2-3 minutes to let the cookies harden a bit. Otherwise when you try to move them to cooling rack they will just fall apart. Once they are cooled a bit, use a spatula to move the cookies to a cooling rack (Or in my case wax paper since I don't own a cooling rack. How does that happen?!) and you are done!

The recipe makes about 3 dozen very yummy cookies! Which is WAY too many so I recommend having friends come around quite regularly for the next few days because otherwise... That's a LOT of calories.

And, because I haven't mentioned it yet, cookies are NOT part of my zombie apocalypse survival plan. First off, the high calorie count will eventually cause you to gain weight which will inevitably make you run slower. This is a Z.A. no-no. While, in some scenarios, zombies are slow and clumsy (see the old school "Dawn of the Dead" or "Night of the Living Dead") in others they are quick and relatively smart (as in "The Walking Dead" and "28 Days Later"). In event of the latter situation, you definitely need to be quick on your feet and able to run for long distances to avoid having your brain eaten. Second, sugar is good to burn for a quick fuel source, but it doesn't last long. To keep up your energy you are going to need more protein and carbohydrates than a cookie can offer. Thus, I recommend beef jerky and peanut butter.

So, kids, invest in your dehydrators now!

Jumping on the freezer food bandwagon!

Normally, I'm a good wife. I try my beset to have dinner ready, on the table (or at least in the oven) by the time my husband comes home from work in the evening. The last few weeks has made it nearly impossible to do this, however. Juggling class projects, finals, work, job interviews and general life maintenance caused me to be out of the house a good 13-14 hours a day. This meant that I've been arriving home at the same time, or later, than both my husband and my roommate. This experience has taught me 2 very important facts:

1. The men in my house are useless in pretty much all things house related. 
2. If I don't cook, everyone will starve. Literally. They just don't eat. I mean, how hard is it to throw a couple hot dogs on!?

With a normal full time job on the horizon (YAY!) I decided that it would probably be a good idea to prep some easy, man proof meals. Now, don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that all men are useless in the kitchen. In fact, I know that's not true. I've known many guys that have much more skill than I do in this area. Hell, even my roommate claims to be some sort of master chef who enjoys spending time in the kitchen. This is proven by the fact that he has prepared dinner a total of 3 times since December; two of which involved him ordering pizza. With mushrooms which I'm allergic to and can't eat. WIN!

So, in order to possibly remedy this situation I've decided to join in the new freezer meal fad! I figured that worse case scenario, I can start my day by tossing a bag of whatever into the crock pot and be on my merry way. At least then I will get to eat legitimate food rather than Taco Bell, Dominoes or, my personal favorite, beer. I started out small by prepping 5 different meals, each of which will probably have a day or so of left overs. So, technically, my prepped meals should feed us dinner for at least a week. If this goes well (meaning if the guys are able to comprehend this advanced concept) then I'm considering shopping and planning 2 weeks at a time. A week at a time seems too time consuming and I don't think my freezer is big enough for a month. Also, you have to keep in mind that freezer meals will be somewhat useless during the zombie apocalypse. Once the power goes out all of your food will go bad so you don't want to prep too far in advance or you'll just ruin a bunch of food. We can't have that now can we?

Part of the aftermath to my Costco shopping spree.

Here is the cliff's note version: I created 5 main courses to put in the freezer and save for days when I am unable to be home to make dinner. The reason I only did main courses is that my crock pot is actually really small. Much smaller than I would like it to be. If this experiment goes well then I'm going to invest in a larger one. I found an AWESOME deal on a clearance one that I've been tempted to pick up every time I go into work. I also invested in some really good Ziploc brand bags, rather than the cheapy ones I usually pick up from the dollar store. I figured I'd better be safe than sorry. On each bag I used a Sharpie to write what the meal was, how long to put it in the oven/crock pot and at what temperature, and a recommended side. I highly doubt the boys will be able to handle making a side, but it doesn't hurt to try! In each bag I put all the vegetables, meat, spices and broth needed for the meal. The only thing they need to add is a bit of water if the pot starts getting low. Hopefully that won't be necessary but I had to add it on the bags just in case. You pretty much have to spell out every.single.step involved in the processes or something will blow up. And if they blow up my crock pot I'm going to be pissed.

The meals (Just a heads up, I used a lot of chicken. Mainly because it was on sale...):

Crock Pot BBQ Chicken:

 

Ingredients: 

•  I used 3 thighs and 3 drumsticks, but that will vary depending on how many people you're cooking for. 
• 2 cups of BBQ sauce, which ended up being about 1/2 a bottle. I used sweet and spicy.  =)
• 3 small white onions, diced. 
• 3 Tbs. minced garlic. There's a chance I may have added more than that. I LOVE garlic. 
• 2 small tomatoes, cut however the heck you like really. I just sliced them up. 
• 3 tsp. hot sauce, for a little bit of zest. 
• Salt and pepper to taste.     

How to:

Easy enough. Just pour the bag into the crock pot with 1/2 cup of water or chicken broth. Cook on high for 3-4 hours or on low for about 6. Ish. I recommend pairing this with mashed potatoes. That is probably because I'm obsessed with mashed potatoes...

Crock Pot Chicken Marinara:

 

Ingredients:

• Again, I used 3 thighs and 3 legs. Because I'm awesome like that. And I like symmetry.
• 3/4 cup shredded mozzarella cheese. Or more... I'm unhealthy. 
• 1 jar of marinara sauce. I used the store-bought stuff but that meant I had to add more spices.
• 1 Tbs. oregano
• 1 Tbs. basil
• 4 cloves of garlic
• 3 diced tomatoes
• Salt and pepper to taste

How to:

Pretty much the same as above. Put the contents of the bag into the crock pot with 1/2 cup of water or chicken broth. Cook on high for 3-4 hours or on low for about 6. I bought a few loaves of garlic bread to put in the freezer and cook as needed. 

Crock Pot Lemon-Herb Chicken and Asparagus:

 

Ingredients:

• Once again, 3 chicken thighs and 3 legs.
• 1 bunch of asparagus, which is about 6-7 stalks. Can you measure asparagus in stalks?
• 3 small tomatoes
• 1/4 cup lemon juice
• 1 Tbs. basil
• 1 Tbs. oregano
• 1 Tbs. minced onion
• 2 Tbs. minced garlic
• 1/2 Tbs. celery seed (crushed, whole... doesn't really matter)
• Salt and pepper to taste. I like a decent amount of pepper with this recipe. 

How to:

Same old, same old. Pour the contents of the back into the crock pot with about 1/2 cup of water or chicken broth. Cook on high for 3-4 hours or on low for 6-ish. I'm a big fan of steamed rice with this meal. White or brown. 

Crock Pot Pot Roast:

 

Ingredients: 

• 3 to 3 1/2 pound beef pot roast
• 1 pkg brown gravy mix
• 2 small onions, chopped
• 2 cups sliced baby carrots
• 3 stalks of celery, chopped
• 1/2 cup diced green peppers
• 3 Tbs. minced garlic
• 1/2 can beef broth
• 2 bay leaves
• Salt and pepper to taste

How to:

Add bag contents to the crock pot and cook on high for 4-5 hours or on low for 6-7. Sauce should thicken as it cooks, but if it doesn't add 1-2 Tbs. of flour and let simmer for 5-10 minutes. I really like cooking this with diced, roasted potatoes with garlic olive oil and rosemary. 

And, lastly, Baked Italian Seasoned Chicken with Veggies:

 

Ingredients: 

• 6 thighs and 6 legs. Gotcha didn't I? My baking pans are bigger than my crock pot. lol
• 5 Tbs. Italian Seasoning (basil, oregano, marjoram, rosemary, sage and thyme)
• 3 Tbs. minced garlic
• 1 large green pepper
• 1 large red pepper
• 3 small tomatoes
• 1 medium onion
• 1/4 cup lemon juice
• Salt and pepper to taste

How to: 

Put contents of the Ziploc into a 13"x9" baking dish and cook for about 45 minutes at 375 degrees. Really any kind of pasta is great with this. Then again... I love carbs. A lot. 

That was it for my first attempt. I'll let you know if it was a massive success or not. Or, even somewhat of a success. I'll take whatever I can get at this point in time. There are still a ton more non-chicken meals that I'm looking forward to trying, but the next crock pot meal will definitely be loaded baked potato soup. Oh man that sounds amazing!




Until next time folks!

Dog park drama.

Lately, my evenings have been ending with the dog park. As much as I'd rather it not. My goal on most days is to arrive at the park before 3pm and get the heck out of there before 4:30. "Why" you ask? Because (as my title alludes) the dog park is drama. More drama than you would anticipate from a place where puppies go to play, but the last month or so that's pretty much all it has been. One of my dog park buddies and I have decided we're going to submit the show idea to that TrueTV channel. They have reality shows on pretty much everything anyway! So, I figured I would give you folks a sneak peak at our first episode of "Bradshaw Brawls." Or "Dog Wars." Or... something better.

We open the show with Lucy, a tiny silkie terrier. Her owner Angela brings her to the park everyday, but little do they know that today they will find themselves in the middle of a Bradshaw brawl. Dun dun duuunnnnn.... (I'm pretty much awesome at the intros).

Lucy found a playmate in a snobby little poodle. By playmate I mean she followed him around the park in circles because that's what the little dogs do. Suddenly, poodle dog snaps and a flurry of fur ensues! For like a second and a half. The two dogs separate and poodle boys owner is hysterical claiming that her dog was bitten. Granted no one knows for sure since she refused to let anyone check the pup out (suspicious much?).
So, what is the most logical way to handle this totally common situation? Well obviously poodle boy's mom should threaten to pepper spray Angela because, you know, that's how we roll out here in Sacramento. But wait! She does better than threaten, she sprays! She eliminated the threat of the 50 year old women with the 5 pound dog.
Police arrived on scene and thus ended this portion of BRADSHAW BRAWLS!!!!!

I'm making this episode short and sweet, mainly because I have to head out to class to take a final. But I think you get the idea. Basically, people are freaking NUTS! I have a ton of other stories but, sadly, you will have to wait until the next episode.

However, if you have any name suggestions for this segment they would be greatly appreciated! I will give you creative credit when our shows airs on TrueTV and becomes wildly successful prompting T-shirt and DVD sales. I imagine the shirts will look something like this:

So, until next time!

Garden. Take 3.

As I may have mentioned (I think), Matt and I purchased our first "real" home back in December. I say "real" because we also own a condo that we've decided doesn't count because it was...lame. So now, we have a yard! And, in celebration of said yard, I decided it would be an awesome idea to start a garden. Not only would we save a few bucks on groceries every month, but we would also have less food crammed in our fridge going bad since the boys only eat veggies if I hide them in the food. Also, gardens are fantastic to have for the zombie apocalypse. You have to have a certain level of self sufficiency in order to survive.

Back to the garden. Our backyard was a mess. A HUGE mess. It looked as if no one had even been in it in years. There were probably a good 7-8 different types of large bushes/trees, not to mention an about 2 foot thick layer of decaying leaves. I really wish we had taken more "before" photos because the afters would look SO much more impressive. There were two sets of raised flower beds: A large one that ran along the back fence, and 2 smaller  ones that ran along the sides of the yard and across the front of the large bed. That seemed a bit redundant to me so, we cut them down a bit and use part of the back bed for the garden.
This is what we had to work with.

Imagine the mess to the right of the screen only covering the entire back and side of the yard. 

The most logical plan of action was to just rip everything out. So, that's what we did. Or I guess I should say that's what I did because, contrary to popular belief, the men were terrible at all things yard related. It took pretty much forever but eventually we I cleared all but 3 trees and removed the small flower bed than ran across the front of the larger one (you can kind of see it, the wavy brick line, to the right of the picture). In Because we have two large dogs it was decided that low maintenance was the way to go so, instead of flowers in the flower beds, we put mulch. Lots and lots of mulch. FINALLY, it was time to deal with the whole garden thing. I called dibs on my corner and laid down some legit Lowe's soil. First to go in were our fruit trees; a lemon and an orange. Then we played the waiting game. Matt purchased one of those garden starter kits that you plant and sprout inside. We thought it was a fantastic idea!

It really wasn't. The seeds actually did really well. Within in couple weeks we had some pretty impressive little plants. So impressive, in fact, that our cat Whitey decided he need to make sure they were safe for human kitty consumption. He ate the tops off of pretty much everything. They were now sad, sad little plants. But, we persevered! We took those sad, sad little plants and transferred them to my new fenced little garden and, surprisingly, a lot of them actually continued to grow. I was pretty thrilled, mainly because I generally kill everything, always. I inherited my mom's black thumb. Funny side story: My mom killed a fake plastic tree.

It wasn't much but it was something and I was proud of myself!  =p

It was a happy little garden until, one fateful and stormy night.... This happened...

Really? REALLY!?! Stupid tree.

At this point, I had given up. I mean, it's pretty obvious that I am not supposed to have a garden. If this means I have to raise cattle and chickens in my backyard in order to survive the zombies then so be it! I mean, technically there is some sort of rule in our neighborhood that forbids having barnyard animals in your back yard, but I figure that once they all turn to zombies the enforcers of said rules probably won't care as much. I mean, you would assume that, being undead and all, zombie would be a bit more lenient in regards to the rules of local home owner's associations. 

Sorry, sidetracked again. Anyways, I thought I had given up gardening. I mean, obviously the fruit and vegetable gods were opposed to my success so why bother trying again? Well, after my near death experience with kidney stones this weekend I came to the decision that I needed to be productive, so I tried again. I attempted to fix what remained of my smashed little white fence and transplanted my lemon tree to the other side of the plot. Then, I went all in. I used all of the seeds we had left and, being the creative genius that I am, made little markers out of a few of the million of rocks we have lying around the property. So, with any luck, in a few short weeks we will start to see the growth of some pretty little (eventually edible) plants! I will let you know if it's possible to turn a black thumb green. I know you will be impatiently awaiting an update!

My mangled little fence and dying lemon tree.

And, I still am completely unaware of how to make these pictures stay right side up.  =(